Before you write to your bishops, find out as much information about them as you can. This is important, because your letters/messages will be much more effective if your style and content are tailored to their individual recipients.

You should try to find out:

• Who they are (name, gender, age, background)
• Their email and postal addresses
• What church tradition, if any, they identify with (‘Forward in Faith’, open Anglo-Catholic, open evangelical, conservative evangelical, liberal, middle of the road, etc.)
• What their attitudes are towards LGBTQIA+ people and in particular towards the marriage of same-sex couples in church
• Are they on the LLF Next Steps group? If so, they are taking a lead in recommending how the Church moves on after LLF

• The factual details (name, address etc) can be found from the diocesan websites, which normally have the address https://diocese_name.anglican.org/. The details of the diocesan bishop are usually easy to find, but you may have to use the website’s search facility to look for ‘area bishops’ or ‘suffragan bishops’. If the diocese has an online clergy directory you should be able to find the bishops’ contact details.
• Another useful source is the online Crockford’s Directory (https://www.crockford.org.uk/) if you have a subscription.
• Most diocesan bishops and some area/suffragan bishops have Wikipedia pages. Bear in mind that these may not be fully up to date.
• You can search online for the bishop by name (Rt Revd name) or title (Bishop of diocese_or_area).
• You can get an idea of a bishop’s original church tradition from:
  • where they trained for ordination
  • the websites of the churches they ministered in before becoming a bishop
  • any church organization they belong to, for example Church Society or CEEC (conservative evangelical)
  But bear in mind that their opinions may have changed, sometimes substantially, over time.
• Some bishops have made their attitudes to LGBTQIA+ issues plain by their public statements, but many are reluctant to do so. Ask around, and if you need help with this please email contact+TTB@code-equal-marriage.org.uk.
• A list of the bishops who are on the Next Steps group can be found at https://www.churchofengland.org/resources/living-love-and-faith/living-love-and-faith-next-steps – scroll down to the heading ‘Who are the members of the Next Steps Group?‘

That’s up to you! If you want some suggestions there are some ideas below, but don’t be limited by them. Choose two or three themes that are really important to you and that you can write about from experience and with understanding. Pray about your choice of themes.

Your aim is to persuade the bishops to take what you say seriously and to be more accepting and affirming of same-sex relationships. Try to find points in common with each bishop, even if in some cases your views are very different from theirs.

Without telling the bishops what to do, which would be impolite, explain what changes you hope for in the Church’s teaching and practice, why you believe that, and perhaps suggest how those changes could happen.

Although there will probably be some core points that you will want to make to all the bishops (even if in somewhat different words), do remember to bear in mind what you know about each bishop’s views, background etc. It’s not a good idea to write almost the same message to a very conservative anti-gay bishop as to one who is inclusive!

These are just ideas for you to consider writing about, listed in random order. Don’t include too many, and don’t feel you have to include any of them.

• Your experiences of discrimination in the Church
• Your positive experiences of the life and ministry of LGBTQIA+ people
• Why LGBTQIA+ people should be accepted and treated equally
• The value of loving, committed same-sex relationships
• Biblical reasons for including LGBTQIA+ people, such as the New Testament stories of inclusion of previously excluded people – Gentiles, eunuchs, etc
• Why same-sex couples should be able to marry in church
• Comments on Living in Love and Faith
• Why bishops should speak openly and honestly about what they think
• The need for everyone’s conscience to be respected, whether they are willing or unwilling to marry same-sex couples in church
• The injustice of the severe penalties imposed on clergy or ordinands who marry their same-sex partner
• The examples of other Churches that have embraced equal marriage: the Scottish Episcopal Church, The Episcopal Church [USA], the Methodist Church of Great Britain, the URC – and others that are close to doing so: the Church in Wales, the Church of Scotland

Practical points

Letter or email? If you know the bishop personally, email is probably better. Otherwise it probably doesn’t matter much, though a letter has the advantage that it’s more likely to be read and filed. A typed letter is fine; only send a handwritten letter if it is neat and legible. If you type a letter, remember to sign it.

Signing off Unless you know the bishop well, be reasonably formal: e.g. Yours sincerely, Kind regards, With all good wishes. Avoid pious signoffs such as Yours in Christ. Give your full name and postal address, plus any other contact details you’re happy to be used if they reply.

Good writing style

• Write clear, simple English. Check the spelling and grammar.
• Keep the sentences and paragraphs reasonably short.
• The letter/message should ideally be no longer than one side of A4 paper, two at the most. You may find it easier to write a long first draft and then cut it down drastically, even if it means omitting points you would love to say.
• Make sure the letter/message flows well and makes logical sense.

Appropriate tone

• Be polite and respectful but not obsequious. Avoid anything that might be taken as offensive, insulting or demeaning.
• Don’t be over-formal, but don’t be unduly informal or inappropriately friendly.
• Write from the heart: share how you feel as well as how you think. Don’t be afraid of mentioning your own faith journey (but don’t overdo it).
• Be honest, but avoid saying something that you know would put the bishop off – like telling an evangelical you have no time for the Bible (if that were the case)!